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Post by Belchic on Aug 6, 2006 11:58:25 GMT -5
I'm not really pleased at how "Love 'Em and Flea 'Em" turned out. I know we all love it, but I was hurt to see Mooch pick on Lucky like that. In this topic, I am going to rewrite the episode the way it should have been starting from a specific point in the episode. I'm going to do it later, because I'm going to be busy today. Stay tuned!
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Post by hybridmisfit on Aug 6, 2006 12:30:39 GMT -5
sounds like and interesting idea Belchic
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Post by Belchic on Aug 6, 2006 23:10:46 GMT -5
Throughout the day, I thought maybe I wouldn't want to do this, but I've already committed myself to writing the fic, so I'm going to do it. I have split this up into 3 chapters, and tonight, I'm giving you the first one.
Chapter 1 - Two-Tone saves Lucky
Two-Tone had gone through Nanny's box of yard sale stuff to look for an outfit she'd want for her to wear so that she could get Mooch's attention. What she didn't know was that Mooch wasn't in the mood to ask her out at the moment, so she picked a bad time to do so. After Mooch ditched her, she decided she wasn't even going. Unbeknownest to Two-Tone, Lucky was a little dissappointed that she wasn't taking him to the dance. When they ran into each other, Lucky said he'd take her to the dance, and she agreed. Here's where the story began.
Two-Tone: Oh, Mooch? I just came by to say to you, I have nothing to say to you. If I had anything to say to you, I'd say it to Lucky, my date tonight at the dance.
Mooch: Say what? You always go out with me!
Two-Tone: Correction. Used to go with you. But you didn't ask me. Lucky did.
As she left, Mooch got really upset.
Mooch: I can't believe she ditched me! Come on guys, Lucky is about to become a little unlucky!
Little did Mooch know, Two-Tone overheard this.
Two-Tone: Uh-oh. I gotta warn Lucky!
Two-Tone rushed over to Lucky as quickly as she could. Luckily they ran into each other before Mooch got to him.
Two-Tone: Lucky! Thank goodness I found you! You're in danger! Come with me, quickly!
Lucky: What's the big deal?
Two-Tone: I'll explain later. Come on.
Two-Tone lead Lucky to an area in the barn that not many puppies have been to.
Two-Tone: Listen, Lucky. Mooch is a little jealous that you're taking me to the dance and he's not. I just overheard that he and Wizzer and Dipstick are going to do something to you that will make you feel very bad.
Lucky: What are they plotting?
Two-Tone: I don't know, but you have got to keep yourself hidden from them.
Rolly and Cadpig then walked by with a sheet of some kind. Two-Tone called them over.
Two-Tone: Rolly, Cadpig, come here a second.
They did so.
Two-Tone: I want you guys to do me a favor and hide Lucky from Mooch. I want you to cover him up with that blanket, and don't let him out of your sight until I get back.
Cadpig: Got it.
Rolly: Okay.
They did so, and Two-Tone went off.
Rolly: Do you really think we should be doing this?
Cadpig: Well, we are his best friends in the whole wide world, so I guess it's for the best of it...and for Two-Tone's sake.
Lucky: The things I do for love.
---
That's the end of Chapter 1. I'll plan on writing Chapter 2 tomorrow.
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Post by LoneWanderer Raiden on Aug 6, 2006 23:16:14 GMT -5
Hmm. Pretty good so far, Belch. Can't wait to see what happens next.
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Post by sip on Aug 6, 2006 23:24:07 GMT -5
This sounds interesting ^w^.. i would like to see what hapens next... XP
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Post by hybridmisfit on Aug 6, 2006 23:25:16 GMT -5
sounds cool so far and nice courage the cowardly dog referance
I'll delete my reply to jorb
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Post by sip on Aug 6, 2006 23:47:37 GMT -5
but why just delete the post??.. this is a forum and he got his right to express what he/she feels ^w^.. at last i guess thats the purpose of a Forum.. Express ourselves..^O^...
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Post by Two-Tone on Aug 7, 2006 0:23:40 GMT -5
nice chapter Belchic
*blinks* did I miss anything?
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Post by huntsman on Aug 7, 2006 4:28:36 GMT -5
I hate fan-fiction; I mean, I really hate it. With that out of the way, I suppose it’s decent, though I believe the episode was made the way it was in real life due to the fact that it was an eleven minute episode. If the episode would have been a full twenty-two minutes, a lot more could have been done, though I suppose I’m digressing from the fact.
Some advice, though, Two-Tone speaks more flamboyantly than how you’ve portrayed her. She has a unique speech pattern and she often uses words that reflect that, though perhaps it’s impossible to obtain true accuracy in such cases.
Anyway, keep up the good work. I’ll keep reading the rest of it, though you’ll have to make a masterpiece to earn much of my praise, as I really hate fan-fiction.
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Post by Deleted on Aug 7, 2006 15:09:18 GMT -5
nice job Belchic im likeing this
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Post by monkey on Aug 7, 2006 17:08:43 GMT -5
All I'm going to say is "Riiiiight....."
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Post by Belchic on Aug 8, 2006 0:28:54 GMT -5
Chapter 2 - Undercover for the Night
Two-Tone raced back to the box of yard sale junk that she and Cadpig encountered earlier that morning. She started sorting through the box again.
Two-Tone: Now let's see, what can I use for this?
She pulled out something relatively large, but from one's eye, no one can really tell what it is.
Two-Tone: Yes, this should do the trick. Now to get back to Lucky.
Two-Tone made it quickly back to Lucky's hiding place. Back there, he was still hidden under the blanket, and Cadpig and Rolly were still guarding him.
Lucky: Is she back yet? I'm broiling under here!
Cadpig: Well, at least you're not suffocating.
Rolly: Oh, here she comes right now.
Lucky: Finally!
When Two-Tone walked back, she whispered something to Rolly and Cadpig, then they unveiled Lucky and went off with the sheet.
Patch: Are you two done with that thing? I need that to finish decorating.
Cadpig: Sure, you can take it now.
They gave it to Patch and went outside.
Lucky: So, what is this you're having me do, Two-Tone?
Two-Tone: I have a plan that will keep you hidden from Mooch for the rest of the day...*flirtatiously* while at the same time, spend the day with me.
Lucky growled like a tiger.
Two-Tone: Here, first I want you to put these on.
Lucky: Wait, Two-Tone. What if Mooch or one of his gangsters spy on us in here.
Two-Tone: Don't you worry your fuzzy little head about that. I sent Rolly and Cadpig out to distract them.
Back outside, that is precisely what they were doing. Rolly and Cadpig managed to pull off some stupid acts that easily entertained Mooch and his gang. Back in the barn, Lucky put on what Two-Tone told him to put on, which turned out to be a dark hat and a pair of sunglasses with a goofy looking nose in the center of it.
Lucky: *looking at his reflection* Bow wow wow...weird. I look like Bob Dylan on a vacation in the UK.
Two-Tone: Okay, you got those on, Lucky? Now, hop onto my shoulders.
Lucky jumped onto Two-Tone's back.
Two-Tone: ...my SHOULDERS.
Lucky moved forward so that his hind legs were over Two-Tone's shoulders.
Two-Tone: Okay, Lucky. Here we go.
Two-Tone stood up on her hind legs.
Lucky: Whoa! Hey, I never knew I was this tall.
Two-Tone: Because you're not. I'm helping you. Okay, now see that cloak hanging over there? Slip it on.
Two-Tone walked over so that Lucky could grab it, and he did just as he was told.
Lucky: This is going to be great!
Two-Tone: Mooch will never get his way!
Lucky: Hey, Two-Tone? Am I too heavy?
Two-Tone: Heck, no. You're the lightest boy in the family. You're so light that even Cadpig can lift you!
Lucky: Well, that's true...You sure this will work, Two-Tone?
Two-Tone: Trust me. As long as you don't talk to me and I don't say anything, everything should work just perfectly.
With everything said and done, Lucky and Two-Tone closed up the cloak, and the disguised pups went outside staying as they were until the Fall Ball. Meanwhile, Mooch and his gang had eventually gotten rid of Rolly and Cadpig.
Mooch: What gives here? I have not seen Lucky all day!
Dipstick: Cheer up, Mooch. I'm sure he'll show up.
Wizzer: Yeah, he's always here, so it's not like he's left the farm.
Mooch: But I want to get back at him so bad for stealing Two-Tone from me!
Just after he said this, Lucky and Two-Tone walked by. This caught the trio's attention, but Lucky made no eye contact with any of them.
Dipstick: Who is that big guy?
Wizzer: I don't know. Never seen him before.
Mooch: Hmmm...he looks familiar. I think we should follow him.
Wizzer stopped Mooch.
Wizzer: No, Mooch. Bad idea. I know about mysterious looking strangers, and they lead to big trouble.
Mooch: Well, all right.
Lucky and Two-Tone were now out of the gang's site, but were close enough to listen in on them.
Mooch: Who cares about that dude, anyway? The minute I see that dalmatian, Luckless, I am going to beat him up like there's no tomorrow!
Two-Tone: *gasps* That dirty dog!
Lucky: Well, now what are we going to do?
Two-Tone: It's time for Plan B.
---
This concludes Chapter 2. Look, I'm sorry if it sucks, okay? If you don't like what I'm writing, just live with it.
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Post by Jorb on Aug 8, 2006 1:18:18 GMT -5
You deleted my post? Because I had an opinion you didn't like? This is supposed to be a forum for free speech, not whiny little punks who can't take an oposing point of view.
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Post by huntsman on Aug 8, 2006 1:26:29 GMT -5
You deleted my post? Because I had an opinion you didn't like? This is supposed to be a forum for free speech, not whiny little punks who can't take an oposing point of view. What was it you said? I respect free speech, though, I'm really not important on this forum.
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Post by Two-Tone on Aug 8, 2006 2:07:00 GMT -5
sounded more like a bash to me
anyhow good chapter
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