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Post by ArtyJayWolf on Jan 6, 2016 19:20:27 GMT -5
If you guys will notice, I am now known as DJ RJ and my profile pic has changed! Hope you guys like it!
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Post by ArtyJayWolf on Jan 31, 2016 22:03:53 GMT -5
Time for an expression that no one will read... Honestly, who cares about DJ RJ? Online or IRL, what am I?
This is basically a huge confession... Letting out how I really feel.
First of all, I'm reading through some of the older threads and some of the locked threads for whatever reason... Let me just say...
I'm flippin' terrified!
Tac scares me... Makes me nervous... And I kinda wanted to draw a picture of Tic-Tac and Aria or something. If not that, then a pic of Tic-Tac as one of the Classes I made up. And if not that, feature him or have him make a cameo in my main fanfiction "Dragons of Skylands". But... Still... Mad Pup Tic-Tac... He's like the Mad King Ryan Haywood from Achievement Hunter.
Nemo... I screwed up, like an idiot, I'm still haunted. I think I morally and permanently messed things up between the two of us with that whole thing at Christmas.
Truth is, I was actually working on a birthday pic for her, but I was afraid to post it. I didn't want her to think I was trying to get out of punishment or something. I know, this is my own d**n fault, and I'm not denying it. I'm just cutting my own wrists, so to speak. But I lost the sketch, so I couldn't finish the drawing! So instead of making a new one or searching for it, I'm just waiting until next year. If you want to just give me the riot act, then I'm open.
I also feel like I'm an absolutely terrible writer. No one's interested in my stuff, no matter what I write about! It's also probably the medieval, fantasy and Anthro factors, and in that case, I came to the wrong community. I'd comment on all of your art threads and fanfiction threads if I didn't have the amazing talent of thrusting awkwardness and hatred towards me everywhere I go!
I'm literally in tears as I'm writing this... No, I don't expect sympathy or empathy, or whatever the correct term is!
This is normal for me, I mentally, emotionally AND sometimes physically beat myself up all the time, it's not exclusive to the board, so don't worry. I'm just a massive screw-up, my life and myself are... flippin'.. Worthless.
I feel like Sparky will look at me and go, "This kid... The hell's wrong with him? What has my board brought upon me?"
I'm truly sorry I've poisoned this board with my BS and with my presence in general, and if you truly want me to leave, that's perfectly fine.
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Post by Two-Tone on Jan 31, 2016 22:30:08 GMT -5
DJ we don't want you to leave. Yeah Tac can be terrifying when he wants to be.
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Post by Lucky on Jan 31, 2016 22:42:50 GMT -5
I agree with TT, but you can't beat yourself up over this, I mean think about it, we do want to see you contribute to this board and most of all, I've been thinking about making my own Anthro series as well, I've got my own Head Canon to begin with and everything, so what if I don't get a comment or a simple. "Oh, I enjoy this character.", "This story is awesome, I like the part where Shawn does this or Balance said that." I'm still going to do it.
I'm not going to stop, I'm going to go past the part where people have given up and work hard at it, I'm not going to stop there, I'm done giving up, if I don't get any comments about the stories and the characters I write, then so be it, I want to write these stories and create these characters that make me happy.
We don't want you to leave and we're not forcing you too either, I know Tac's scary, but I think he's more scared of me than I am with him, cause I actually introduced myself to him and he didn't respond, but I'm not going to worry about it.
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Post by babclayman on Feb 1, 2016 4:47:08 GMT -5
Yeah, we do wish to keep you about, DJW! Why wouldn' we?
You shouldn' let Tac spook you, considering it's been months since he's been on.
Do not take the Story case personally either. Stories do tend to get hush reaction, or we tell you what you think of them, on IM.
I would comment myself, but my life is really busy, at this time. You RP good, so that shows you are good at Writing.
Also, I am sure Nemo doesn' hold a grudge to you. I have annoy her, in the past, myself, and she is still Okay with me. Have you even PM her, or anything? Ask her yourself, and I am sure she is Okay, with you! You were nw to the Secret Santa thing and made a mistake. There isn' anyone, in this World, who claims they haven' other wise.
I am not thinking; "What's wrong with you", I am thinking "There's DJW"!
We have nothing agains you, DJW! Why would you think other wise?
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Post by ArtyJayWolf on Feb 1, 2016 7:03:48 GMT -5
I don't know, I've just been depressed lately... I don't let that show in the Skype chat, though...
Yeah. At first, Tac came off to me as a pretty chill guy... Take a look at the threads from five years ago... Flat-out hates everyone. Hates Lucky (Or Series Lucky, probably... No one uses movie Lucky except me... XD), Hates Pongo and Perdy, hates the lot of us, and yeah...
@ Lucky Yeah, I write because I want to write, too. I want to become a better writer, but it doesn't hurt to know you're not doing it for nothing, right? Doesn't hurt to get some feedback to help become better, right?
@ bab Except I screwed up on her birthday. You can't screw up greater than that. That was pretty much the first impression I gave to her of myself. In terms of an event or group activity of some sort, which basically proves that I can't work well in a group. I'm untrustworthy. I'm just the biggest pile of screw-up this board has ever seen. If that's not reason to hate me for years to come without going drastic, I don't know what is.
No, I didn't PM her about it because I'm terrified.
I don't know, sometimes I just everyone I know hates me and is against me, and I feel if I were gone, no one would notice unless I explicitly pointed it out. Often times, that's how it works. No one notices a thing I do unless I pave a stone path right to it.
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Post by babclayman on Feb 1, 2016 8:32:38 GMT -5
Well, you were not the only Pup who did, DJW.
Like General tells you, Nemo is not the type to hold grudges. I am sure Nemo shall be Okay, if you ask.
You will try to contact her, promise? ;3
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Post by ArtyJayWolf on Feb 1, 2016 18:12:36 GMT -5
What am I gonna tell her?
"Hey, I'm sorry I screwed up your birthday and everything, it's fine if you hate me for the rest of my life. Oh by the way, I was working on a birthday image for you, but decided not to post it because I A) Didn't want to make you angrier, B) Didn't want you to think I was trying to get out of punishment and C) Lost the sketch?!
I'm gonna make it worse by saying something. Gonna make it worse than that if I don't say something. Either way... I'm still terrified, and I'm still gonna get the riot act.
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Post by babclayman on Feb 1, 2016 18:20:25 GMT -5
Well, try not to sound aggressive or desperate.
Though, You do realise, she can read this Page too?
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Post by ArtyJayWolf on Feb 1, 2016 18:29:32 GMT -5
I know that... She's gonna see this, and think less of me.
Sorry if I came off as aggressive, that wasn't my intent...
Because that's how things work in my life. I actually express myself and not bottle things inside, and I get hurt more. I know, I brought this upon myself. I know.
I'm tired, and I just wanted to get that off my chest... That's another one of my screw-ups. I don't have the guts to just tell anything to anyone. I usually just keep everything bottled up inside me because I don't want people to look at me and go, "Hey, look at this piece of ****! Remember how he screwed up this, this, this, this, this, this, and this?" But that happens anyways, regardless of the bottle called my life!
I don't need a reminder every five seconds on how worthless I am! This is one of the reasons why I spend so much time on the computer, away from other people in real life. I don't want to get hurt anymore...! But obviously, that's never gonna happen.
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Post by Belchic on Feb 3, 2016 0:33:12 GMT -5
I know how you feel in some ways.
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Post by ArtyJayWolf on Jun 17, 2016 21:41:20 GMT -5
That's it... I just can't anymore...
I'm SERIOUSLY debating just scraping all of my characters. Not just the ones from 101D but ALL of my characters. Because General is right.
EACH AND EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM ARE MARY SUES OR GARY STUS.
My characters are a sort-of embodiment of my own personal flaws. What I want to fix in MYSELF, what I AM, and what I want to BECOME. Especially my character RJ! The embodiment of ME in this fandom. I WANT to be a mechanical engineer when I get older. So, RJ is smart enough to be one.
I know, SHOW what you mean, and stop TELLING.
Do you know how difficult that is for me? Do you?! I really should just drop out and spare you guys of my stupidity!
There are a TON of talented people on this planet who are good at a lot of things!
I'm BLESSED and THANKFUL to be proficient at math, science, Martial Arts, Archery, art, running, some sports, and learning how things function!
If you're telling me that characters, UNREALISTIC CHARACTERS can't be similar then that's ludicrous.
That's all I have to say. Put the pieces together and FIGURE IT OUT.
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Post by Lucky on Jun 17, 2016 23:54:11 GMT -5
I can't really say I know how you feel about the Mary Su's and Gary Stu's, but I will say this, it's cool that you were taught Martial Arts, I've been trying to take it for I don't know how long, I can understand how you feel though, hurt, angry, I too was let down, RJ, I was too, Shawn having a Robotic eye and leg, the pups being Ninja's cause I found that interesting and I still do.
Showing is cool and telling is cool too, I mean look at my characters, I thought people would be interested in Will cause he's a bounty hunter, Jeremy and Bart are one of a kind characters for me, cause Jeremy is looking for a good laugh and Bartholomew is similar to a butler except in dog form.
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Post by babclayman on Jun 18, 2016 6:13:55 GMT -5
Calm yourself, DJW.
Not al of them are Sue, like you claim. There is Percy, and he doesn' seem Sue like to me.
There are ways that you can work on the points you have, and you do nt have to build them from the groun up. If you like, I can discuss some of the traits, your Dalmatians have, if it helps?
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Post by ArtyJayWolf on Aug 26, 2017 23:13:29 GMT -5
Time for a change.
What's up guys? It's me, DJ RJ. I'm going to attempt to make a comeback in this fandom.
My story writing has improved tremendously and I'm revolutionizing my topics of interest. No more medieval and magic, no more of that nonsense...
And more slice of life and drama. Still anthro though. So yeah. It's good to be back.
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