Post by crosswise on Jul 24, 2007 17:40:24 GMT -5
TAC-NAPPED!
“Sir, are you SURE this is a good idea?” Tac had grown used to Crosswise asking him that question every five minutes. He just tuned him out. This trip was absolutely VITAL to Tac’s plans. All he needed to do was gain a few vital materials and then—
“Sir, are you SURE…” Crosswise started again. Tac grated his teeth together and finally glared Crosswise into silence.
“YES!” Tac snapped at Crosswise. “I need to be here to get the parts I need from them! This is the greatest gathering of evil masterminds in the world! I HAVE to be here in order to take advantage of this!”
“But—” Crosswise started to say as he looked outside the grate. The two pups were walking through the air ducts of the convention center where the annual EvilCon was being held. They looked out the assembly of evil criminals, masterminds, and geniuses.
“Oh look, Professor Nimnul got into a slap fight with Doctor Drakken again.” Tac noted. “They do that every year.”
“Does that kid with the eye-liner get beat up by that little bald kid too?” Crosswise asked.
“Jack Spicer and Gizmo? Yes.” Tac said blandly. “This is why for all their intellect, none of these fools have ever—or will ever—take over the world.”
“Their horrible dress sense?” Crosswise guessed. Tac shot him a look, not entirely sure if he was joking or not.
“Their EGOS.” Tac deigned to explain. “Do you really think that any of these fools could execute a plan without screwing it up themselves? Look at PHDeVil. Look at The Monarch.”
“That guy in the butterfly suit?” Crosswise asked.
“That’s him. There problem—aside from, as you said, their horrible clothing—is there own egomania.”
“If they’re such dolts, then why are we here?” Crosswise asked. Tac grinned slyly.
“This isn’t just a mean for those two legged sacks of meat.” The evil puppy replied as he continued walking through the duct. “The most clever evil masterminds of the animal kingdom will be here as well…to talk, to trade, and to sell one another’s knowledge and expertise…it is HERE that I will get what I need to fulfill my plans.”
“Sir, are you—”
“Crosswise if the next words out of your mouth are ‘sure this is a good idea?’ Then the next words out of my mouth will be ‘is anyone interested in becoming my new henchman? My old one ended up on the business end of a neutering ray.’ ”
“I’ll be good.” Crosswise squeaked in a high-pitched tone. Crosswise followed Tac over to the area where he had set himself up. On the main table were several blue-prints and dangerous looking devices. There were a couple of others spread around it.
“Nice spread sir.” Crosswise noted as he looked around. “Who are all these animals?”
“Evil geniuses, crime lords, and mad scientists.” Tac smiled, for once feeling right at home. “You see that frog over there? That’s Baron Silas Greenback! And that’s Rat Capone!”
“Who’s that gerbil with all the sci-fi stuff?” Crosswise pointed. The ‘gerbil’ in question, an albino creature with long ears and a long tail overheard him and started shouting with a strange accent.
“I am not a gerbil you foolish canine, with your black dots and white fur! I am a hamster! I am Doctor Jacques von Hämsterviel! Hämsterviel! Not gerbil, hamster!” Then he stormed off, leaving Crosswise cowering behind Tac.
“You can come out now, he’s gone.” Tac deadpanned. Crosswise poked his head out and looked around. He blinked when he saw a pair of white mice walking past.
“Sir, is that—?”
“Yes Crosswise. The most diabolical rodent mastermind since the late, great Professor Ratigan…The Brain!”
“Narf.” Crosswise breathed. Tac just looked at him.
“Did you have to do that?” Crosswise frowned in thought.
“Sir, I’ve been thinking…with all these criminals and masterminds here, aren’t we in danger? I mean what if one of them wants to kidnap you to invent for them and use me as a guinea-pig?”
“Not a guinea-pig! I am a hamster! A hamster!”
“I wasn’t talking to you!” Crosswise snapped at Hämsterviel. Tac rolled his eyes.
“We’ll be fine, Crosswise.”
“But, boss you’ve got a table over there with a sign that says ‘Laser Death-Ray Bargain Bin!’”
“Would you just relax?” Tac snapped. “Nothing will happen to us. Come on, let’s go. I have a meeting scheduled with my suppliers.”
“Who are they?” Crosswise asked. He felt his fur stand on end as Tac answered:
“Fat Cat and Carface Caruthers.”
To Be Continued…
&&&
Crosswise is mine.
Tic-Tac belongs to Tac.
Doctor Drakken is from “Kim Possible”
Jack Spicer is from “Xiaolin Showdown”
Gizmo is from “Teen Titans”
The Monarch is from “Venture Brothers”
PHDeVil is from “101 Dalmatians: The Series”
Baron Silas Greenback is from “Danger Mouse”
Doctor Jacques von Hämsterviel is from “Lilo and Stitch: The Series”
Pinky and the Brain are from “Pinky and the Brain”
Professor Ratigan is from “The Great Mouse Detective”
Professor Nimnul, Rat Capone, and Fat Cat are from “Rescue Rangers”
Carface Caruthers is from “All Dogs Go to Heaven”
“Sir, are you SURE this is a good idea?” Tac had grown used to Crosswise asking him that question every five minutes. He just tuned him out. This trip was absolutely VITAL to Tac’s plans. All he needed to do was gain a few vital materials and then—
“Sir, are you SURE…” Crosswise started again. Tac grated his teeth together and finally glared Crosswise into silence.
“YES!” Tac snapped at Crosswise. “I need to be here to get the parts I need from them! This is the greatest gathering of evil masterminds in the world! I HAVE to be here in order to take advantage of this!”
“But—” Crosswise started to say as he looked outside the grate. The two pups were walking through the air ducts of the convention center where the annual EvilCon was being held. They looked out the assembly of evil criminals, masterminds, and geniuses.
“Oh look, Professor Nimnul got into a slap fight with Doctor Drakken again.” Tac noted. “They do that every year.”
“Does that kid with the eye-liner get beat up by that little bald kid too?” Crosswise asked.
“Jack Spicer and Gizmo? Yes.” Tac said blandly. “This is why for all their intellect, none of these fools have ever—or will ever—take over the world.”
“Their horrible dress sense?” Crosswise guessed. Tac shot him a look, not entirely sure if he was joking or not.
“Their EGOS.” Tac deigned to explain. “Do you really think that any of these fools could execute a plan without screwing it up themselves? Look at PHDeVil. Look at The Monarch.”
“That guy in the butterfly suit?” Crosswise asked.
“That’s him. There problem—aside from, as you said, their horrible clothing—is there own egomania.”
“If they’re such dolts, then why are we here?” Crosswise asked. Tac grinned slyly.
“This isn’t just a mean for those two legged sacks of meat.” The evil puppy replied as he continued walking through the duct. “The most clever evil masterminds of the animal kingdom will be here as well…to talk, to trade, and to sell one another’s knowledge and expertise…it is HERE that I will get what I need to fulfill my plans.”
“Sir, are you—”
“Crosswise if the next words out of your mouth are ‘sure this is a good idea?’ Then the next words out of my mouth will be ‘is anyone interested in becoming my new henchman? My old one ended up on the business end of a neutering ray.’ ”
“I’ll be good.” Crosswise squeaked in a high-pitched tone. Crosswise followed Tac over to the area where he had set himself up. On the main table were several blue-prints and dangerous looking devices. There were a couple of others spread around it.
“Nice spread sir.” Crosswise noted as he looked around. “Who are all these animals?”
“Evil geniuses, crime lords, and mad scientists.” Tac smiled, for once feeling right at home. “You see that frog over there? That’s Baron Silas Greenback! And that’s Rat Capone!”
“Who’s that gerbil with all the sci-fi stuff?” Crosswise pointed. The ‘gerbil’ in question, an albino creature with long ears and a long tail overheard him and started shouting with a strange accent.
“I am not a gerbil you foolish canine, with your black dots and white fur! I am a hamster! I am Doctor Jacques von Hämsterviel! Hämsterviel! Not gerbil, hamster!” Then he stormed off, leaving Crosswise cowering behind Tac.
“You can come out now, he’s gone.” Tac deadpanned. Crosswise poked his head out and looked around. He blinked when he saw a pair of white mice walking past.
“Sir, is that—?”
“Yes Crosswise. The most diabolical rodent mastermind since the late, great Professor Ratigan…The Brain!”
“Narf.” Crosswise breathed. Tac just looked at him.
“Did you have to do that?” Crosswise frowned in thought.
“Sir, I’ve been thinking…with all these criminals and masterminds here, aren’t we in danger? I mean what if one of them wants to kidnap you to invent for them and use me as a guinea-pig?”
“Not a guinea-pig! I am a hamster! A hamster!”
“I wasn’t talking to you!” Crosswise snapped at Hämsterviel. Tac rolled his eyes.
“We’ll be fine, Crosswise.”
“But, boss you’ve got a table over there with a sign that says ‘Laser Death-Ray Bargain Bin!’”
“Would you just relax?” Tac snapped. “Nothing will happen to us. Come on, let’s go. I have a meeting scheduled with my suppliers.”
“Who are they?” Crosswise asked. He felt his fur stand on end as Tac answered:
“Fat Cat and Carface Caruthers.”
To Be Continued…
&&&
Crosswise is mine.
Tic-Tac belongs to Tac.
Doctor Drakken is from “Kim Possible”
Jack Spicer is from “Xiaolin Showdown”
Gizmo is from “Teen Titans”
The Monarch is from “Venture Brothers”
PHDeVil is from “101 Dalmatians: The Series”
Baron Silas Greenback is from “Danger Mouse”
Doctor Jacques von Hämsterviel is from “Lilo and Stitch: The Series”
Pinky and the Brain are from “Pinky and the Brain”
Professor Ratigan is from “The Great Mouse Detective”
Professor Nimnul, Rat Capone, and Fat Cat are from “Rescue Rangers”
Carface Caruthers is from “All Dogs Go to Heaven”